I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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