You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
