I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
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