My first STD was from a foam party
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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