problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
