I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Blow job season was short but glorious.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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