well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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