lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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