I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
