She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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