I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
we're making bets on your personal life
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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