Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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