I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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