He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize