I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
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