Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
