Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize