sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
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dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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