I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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