There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
