I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
