I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
