Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
