32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
