If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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