I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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