either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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