Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
