people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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