I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
