So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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