please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
Just dont open the beer drawer.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.