OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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