I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
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