no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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