My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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