More tranny stories later!
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
