In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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