Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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