I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
