When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
