you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize