508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
