Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
