What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
