D3 body, D1 cock
Is it because I queefed?
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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