Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
