You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
