Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
You made out with two different species that night
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
