used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
third nipple confirmed
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
