He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
